Saturday, July 23, 2022

MY INNER MOST THOUGHTS

 My inner most thoughts that no one knows except the one created me, being a person with a disability my biggest fear is being alone and displeasing Jehovah God not about to fulfill his purpose.

Never being good enough in my life and trying to stay positive when the negativity surrounds you consuming your positive light and you are drowning in it.

There are things that I see that anger, saddened and concerned me in a world that doesn’t realize the beautiful around them and the amazing things to be appreciate and give thanks for, look and you will see.

I wished that I could of done much better in my life even though I have accomplished a lot in my life, some how I still feel like I failed. 

I also wished that I could do more for my parents and brothers especially for my mother she has a pillar for my brother and I from the day we were born and she continues to be in our lives. My dream is to give my mom everything she gave my brother and I with her love and sacrifice and I would always like to be a pillar to my our brother on my dad side and show him what it means to truly show unconditional love and kindness.

My inner most thoughts I don’t share because I don’t want to hurt anyone with them so I don’t say anything at all and I try not to complain or bother anyone because they are consumed with their own lives so I try to turn to Jehovah God the one who took the time to create me but sometimes I also feel I am bother to him as well even though I am no trouble to him at all, he’s a God of love. He would never abandon me ever but it’s still difficult to go to him.

That’s why I’m writing my thoughts down so I can go through every emotion that I am feeling trying to get through it with Jehovah’s help.

Thanks listen to my inner most precious thoughts.


Wednesday, July 20, 2022

RETURNED

 I have returned to my daily routine where there is confusion and utter stress that persons don’t see in my smile that hides like a Chameleon in plain sight.

Copyright(c)

Stacyann Parris

Sunday, August 3, 2014

Some people are the most dangerous

It has been awhile since I have taken to my blog and express my feelings on things that have been bothering me
I have been keeping these things to myself and as a result I've been getting sick and my life seems to be spinning out of control. I see a world that I do not recognize anymore and some persons always have something to say behind my back, they can never say it in front of my face because they are afraid that I would look them differently.
In this world I have learned that some persons are not what they seem to be and some are what you see is what you get. You yourself have to figure out who is your true friend and foe, observe carefully and learned from the pass mistakes that you have made and you will see who is for you and who is against you.

Saturday, June 28, 2014

Sometimes I want to say.................

Sometimes I want to say.......What the hell!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sometimes I want to say.......Get out!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sometimes I want to say.......You are a self bastard!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sometimes I want to say.......You are full of crap!!!!!!! 
Sometimes I want to say.......F........ You!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sometimes I want to say.......WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But I can't, so it's deep inside eating me like a virus.
Killing slowly with every breath of my being....
I am dying...........Please help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, June 14, 2014

Who the hell I am really!

Who the hell I am really!
I will tell you who I am
I am a total waste of time, energy, sperm and great genes.
An un-educated fool.......
That's who I am.....

Sunday, March 30, 2014

Continue to see the good in others like Jehovah God does....

Why the hell am I the way I am..........
That's the question here......
Everyone say's you must not put your head on a block for people, but Jesus sacrifice himself for us but he and Jehovah God still loves us despite our sinful nature...

I always try to see the good in others and I do at times but sometimes people are so self absorbed in their own hate, lust and greed that they don't see what is good and graceful in front of their own eyes...

I will always see the good in others like Jehovah God has seen in me...
And I'll never change, that's who I am and that's who I'll always be...
So always give the Father thanks and try your best to see the good in others like the Father himself has seen in you...

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

LOST

For the past or so I've been trying figure somethings out...
It's been a rough couple of months for me...
I feel lost...
I am lost...
Adrift on a mindless sea of nothing...
While the world is sailing on a course for brilliance...

I'm lost.....
I feel lost....
Adrift on a mindless sea of nothing....
Endless memories in prison me...